In the Lunch Room

[Captain Brian Knauer]

Knauer sat in the Lunch Room with a couple of the guards. His acoustic guitar lay in his hands, his finger tips scraping against its wires. This was one of the only ways he had been able to bear the pain of being here. His lips parted to allow him to sing.

"She said, "I'e seen you in here before."
I said, "I've been here a time or two."
She said, "Hello, my
Name is Bobby Jo
Meet my twin sister Betty Lou
And we're both feeling kinda wild tonight
And you're the only cowboy in this place
And if you're up for a rodeo
We'll put a big Texas smile on
Your face"
I said, "Girls,"

[Chorus]
I ain't as good as I once was
I got a few years on me now
But there was a time back in my prime

When I could really lay it down
And if you need some love tonight
Then I might have just enough
I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

I still hang out with my best friend dave
Ive known him since we were kids at school
Last night he
Had a few shots
Got in a tight spot hustlin' a game of pool
With a couple of redneck boys
One great
Big bad biker man
I heard David yell across the room
"Hey buddy, how 'bout a helping hand."
I said, "Dave,"

[Chorus]
I ain't as good as I once was
My how the years have flown
But there was a time back in my prime

When I could really hold my own
But if you wanna fight tonight
Guess thouse boys dont look all that
Tough
I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

I used to be hell on wheels
Back when I was younger man
Now my body says, "You can't do this boy"

But my pride says, "Oh, yes you can

I ain't as good as I once was
Thats just the cold hard truth
I still throw a few back, talk a little smack
When I'm feelin bullet proof
So don't double dog dare me now
'Cause I'd have to call your bluff

I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was
Maybe not be good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was"

The other guards started singing along with him as he continued.

<<These lyrics are copyrighted by Toby Keith and his song "As Good As I Once Was">>

[Judas]

[[Mind if I laugh at you? ^^]]

Hidden among the other convicts, Judas tapped the table in Morse code for ‘What a fu*king performance!’ If no one was going to talk to him, then he might as well to talk to himself.
While the others ignored this ruckus while they ate, Jude had in fact found it rather interesting. Watching guards do a sing-along routine was better than actually eating the slop they put in front of him here. It provided more room for doubling over with unstable gales of laughter; but that might have attracted some attention. So, Judas was letting that steam out through a Morse conversation with himself. Actually, he was directing his comments to the convicts around him, but they only seemed to find the insistent tapping irritating.
Judas, however, was very thick skinned, and ignored these looks with only a few snide comments thrown into his conversation. It was only after he’d grown bored with tapping and their song was almost complete that Judas realized that the sound might have ben picked up by the microphones installed in the room. He twitched and hoped none of the monitoring staff understood a word he was saying.

It was a bit of a one-sided conversation, anyway.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

<Ah, It's no problem>

Handing his guitar to one of the other guards, Knauer turned his attention to Judas. He didn't know morse code, that's what radios were for. Adjusting his cowboy hat, he stalked over to the new inmate, a smirk plastered on his features as he observed him for a moment. He truly didn't know this new man. Another inmate here at Allenville, joy for the Captain.

After all, the stories about the young man were not pleasant ones. Tapping the toe of his boot against the tile floor, he took off his glasses and placed them in his shirt pocket. "You new here Inmate?" he asked rather sternly. His eyes glimmered with a sense of malice as he looked him over.

[Judas]

“Absolutely not, sir,” Judas said without standing up or even turning to face the captain. “I’ve been here since yesterday, sir.” That was classified as ‘not new’ in his books. He’s survived the first night of realizing, ‘Oh sh*t I’m in prison,’ so he was pretty much an old hand by his reckoning. Of course, he hadn’t been beaten up yet, so that was still a black mark on his file, but that’d come soon enough, he was absolutely sure.

Judas poked the lunch tray – empty of course, courtesy of the man sitting next to him – and remained hunched over the table. This was more to hide his smile-plastered face than anything else.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

"Really? Boy, do you know who I am?" Knauer asked sourly as he looked at Judas. "And sit up straight when I'm talkin' to you." A scowl made its way onto his face as he noticed the other guards watching them intensly. Back up was not far away and he knew that... but he didn't want their help... he could take care of himself. After all, he had been doing it for the past 15 years.

He stopped tapping his boot against the tile and folded his arms against his chest in a stern matter. He had no time to deal with fools, especially in this run down shithole. He waited impatiently for the Inmate's answer, praying that it wasn't sarcastic for if it was, he might just break. Captain Brian Knauer had no patience.

[Judas]

“Sorry sir. I have a back problem; it’s grown like this. Can’t sit up straight.” Judas could almost feel trouble brewing, but it was just too damn hard not to say something witty or sarcastic. It was possibly the only way he got though all this sh*t – by being horribly funny all the time. It was a wonder he was often the only one laughing.

Maybe the people here just had no sense of humor. Probably wrung out of them by these dry-as-sand Petes who called themselves guards. They were the most fun to aggravate, of course, because it was so damn easy.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

Roughly putting his hand on the inmate's shoulder, Knauer yanked him up, scowling. "I don't have time for your bullshit, Inmate. What's your name?" he demanded rather roughly as he let go of the Inmate's shoulder. He was not one to be messed with. It was a wonder no one was lying dead at his hand. He had been stuck here all of his life and it didn't make anything pleasant.

For too long he had been living under the Warden's rule and for too long he had dealt with stupid inmates who thought they were witty and smart. Dumb asses. If they were smart, they wouldn't be in here.

[Judas]

Damn. Game’s up, set, and bolt.
Judas allowed himself to be pulled up. It had been done to him before at numerous bars and taverns. He attracted bozos like honey attracts flies.

“Name’s Judas, sir. Judas Ashadar.” There just wasn’t any way to get anything funny out of that question. Jude might have grabbed the guard’s arm and shook it while telling him that his name was Joe, and it was corking to meet him at last, but that wouldn’t have boded all to well for Judas’ survival. Not at all.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

"Judas Ashadar huh? Well Inmate Ashadar, I run this prison, got it? So it would be best if you kept that tongue of yours in check. After all, we don't want trouble... now do we...?" That wasn't a threat that was being said, it was a promise. It had taken the Captain many years to climb up the chain of ranking but he finally made it to the top... He wouldn't try for a Warden position, that had too much authority.

He stepped back one step from the prisoner to make sure that the two had enough space if anyone was gonna lash out. He wasn't going to deal with shit from anyone at this moment in time.

[Judas]

“Of course, sir. I’ll remember that, sir.” Judas said sencirly. Then, not so sincerely, “Valuable advice that I will value indiscriminately, sir.” Oh, this was fun. Death–defying, but fun all the same. Judas supposed this was his alternative to bungee jumping and other adrenaline-creating activities/stupidities.

Which was the greater stupidity, though, jumping off a cliff or taunting a guard, Jude wasn’t quite sure yet. At least with the cliff option you had a large elastic band around your ankles. Here, you could possibly suffer the addition of iron manacles around your ankles.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

A glare passed over the Captain's face as he surveyed the inmate in front of him. Shaking his head, he rolled his eyes and took out his nightstick. Holding it out to reveal it to Judas, he spoke once more. "See this boy? This will be cracked over your body if you don't knock it off." He was not in the mood, was it obvious? Putting it back in its sheath, he held the same glare. He wasn't going to put with this shit.

After all, he got enough of it from the Warden and he didn't need it from this guy. Shaking his head once more, he repositioned his cowboy hat. A sigh passed between his teeth as he stood there.

[Judas]

Judas paused before replying, this time. Now seemed like a good time to stop goofing. Of course, that was a very nice hat – Judas stopped himself from commenting. It was hard, but he managed. Instead, he nodded seriously, as one does when agreeing to something one knows nothing about.

“I’m sure that’d be very painful, sir. You’re an inspiring speaker, did you know? You just inspired me to shut up. Very clever, sir.” Sh*t. That could have done without that last comment.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

A smirk danced onto the Captain's face as he felt rather pleased with himself. Nodding to the inmate, he spoke, "That's very wise of you Inmate... I don't let those who speak back get away easily." His tones were rather vibrant and threatening but he had been able to get away with it for years now. Looking over at the guards, he watched them give a look and glance at each other.

"Imbeciles," he muttered underneath his breath as he looked back at Judas. "What have you done to be here boy?" he asked, putting a piece of gum in his mouth. He chewed slowly on it, feeling the minty freshness.

[Judas]

{minty fresh. ^^}

Judas needed to think about that one. “Well, if by here you mean this jailhouse,” he said, paused, then continued, “I robbed some people; hacked some people. Impersonated some people. Oh – and I hit a cop with my laptop. His head was so damn hard the thing broke on contact. Waste of a good Computer system.”

He smiled winningly. Or, he hoped it was winningly. It could have been anything, but the magazines he shouldn’t be reading described that look as winning. He couldn’t help it.

[Captain Brian Knauer]

Laptop? This word went through the Captain's mind. Shaking his head, he smirked slightly and allowed the inmate to talk. He had no urge to strike this young man down at the moment... which was a good thing in some cases... especially in this one. The Captain had a strong arm and was willing to use it.

"Interesting... I can garuntee that you won't be doing that here Inmate..." he snarled, his smirk disappearing into a glare. He was a bit irritated by the heat but it didn't matter...